#01: Why I Choose Courage Over Confidence
Theres a reason I called this podcast She is Courageous rather than using the word confidence and thats exactly what I'm talking about in this, the first episode.
Here I share with you why I think Courage is the foundation of confidence and why I also think we all need to let go of the heavy label of confidence. I share my simple tips to choosing courage over confidence so that you can do exactly that because when we get courageous we move forward and that builds huge amounts of confidence!
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TRANSCRIPT
Well, hello and welcome to the first episode of the She Is Courageous Podcast. So I thought we would kick off the series with a bit of context on the whole She Is Courageous Title and the name of my online community. Now look, courage in my view, that I've learned over the last few years actually is one of the most critical skills and strengths for success in life and business.
And I genuinely learned this over the last couple of years as a business owner. Because most people, myself included, up until a few years ago, think they need to build their confidence and everything will be okay. I have people come to me all the time. I have people that say, I want to be as confident as you.
I want to build my confidence. I need more confidence. And I'm not saying confidence isn't a great thing to have, it absolutely is, but I think we've got the focus all wrong. Now if you're listening to this now, and you're already wanting to scream at me, it's probably not a good start, is it? But, if you're literally like, but I do Shelley, I need more confidence.
I am not confident, I need to be more confident. If I were more confident, I would. I want to let you know you can absolutely build your confidence. I'm not saying we don't need confidence in life and business. It absolutely helps to have more confidence. But I'm going to start out with a real quick reminder, and you're going to hear me say this so many times.
In all that pressure you're putting on yourself to be more confident, no one is 100 percent confident 100 percent of the time. And that's why today, what I want to start this whole podcast series off in the spirit of everything I stand for, and this stands for, I want to talk about why courage is actually more important than confidence.
Because it's courage that we need to take action. Even though. We have some fear, even though there is uncertainty, even though we don't feel completely confident. Courage is what we need to face challenges head on, if you like, because they're going to come. We have to have courage to face into things when we don't know if we'll get the result we want, when we have no idea how something's going to play out.
Confidence. Confidence is belief in our ability. Confidence comes from a feeling of knowing that we've got this, which in truth is only built through experience. And for most of us, dare I say it, through success, or at least survival through the challenges, and I'm going to go inverted commas, failures.
And this is where the challenge lies. We say we want more confidence and then we'll do the things. If we have more confidence, we will do the things that scare us, the things that we're not sure how they'll work out. But it's courage that we need to actually do them. Particularly, especially when we're not feeling confident.
I think confidence has gained way too much power as a word. It's worn like a big, heavy label. People are always wanting to feel more confident to do the thing because they think they need confidence before taking action. Well, here's the problem. Truth bomb for you. If you're sitting waiting for confidence, it's like sitting waiting to win the lottery, particularly when you haven't even bought a ticket.
You're going to miss out on so many opportunities, waiting, when actually you could be trying, you could be growing, you could be learning, you could be building your belief in you. And that's why it's all about courage. When we choose courage, we learn. When we choose courage, we grow. When we choose courage, we build our confidence.
When we choose courage, we're taking on the fear and saying, come on, let's give this a go anyway. Now, courageous or not, we're still going to have challenges. Uncertainty brings fear. And sometimes that uncertainty can turn into bigger challenges than we'd ever hoped for. But my gosh, do we grow through them.
And that's when we show ourselves just what we're capable of. So today, in this first episode of the She is Courageous podcast, where my whole mission is to inspire and empower all of you to be a little bit more courageous, I want to share with you how you shift your mindset and choose courage over confidence.
Now, before I get into that, I'm going to say again, this will not be the first time you hear me talking about this stuff. This is the foundation of everything that I talk about, and it will ripple into all of the different subjects. Ultimately, I am all about building a courageous mindset. But I've also said, I will always give you practical little tips for how you start to move forward.
And I want to do that today. So here are my Three, two or three simple tips, four maybe, we'll see how I go. Um, I'm not going to give you a number, but I am going to give you some really simple tips on how you can shift your mindset to choosing courage over confidence. First one, I say this all the time, start small.
I literally, in the She is Courageous collective, I bang on about this all the time. It is really great to have big, bold goals. I've got them and I really want you to have them. But big, bold goals can also be scary and overwhelming. And what happens when we're scared and overwhelmed? We get stuck. We don't move.
So having the big bold goal is great. Having big vision for your life, for your business is absolutely wonderful and I want you to have that. But in terms of choosing a courageous mindset, in terms of choosing courage over confidence, you've got to move forward. You've got to do something. So start small.
Take tiny steps if you need to. Because one small step may be a little bit scary, but it's a lot less scary than one big leap. If you could take one step, then you'll feel ready for the next one. And you'll feel proud because you've taken a step, you've moved forward. And that's how we get ourselves into moving more.
That's courage. And guess what? It builds confidence. Because you're showing yourself what you can do. Every time you take an action, you feel a little bit more confident. And a little bit more courageous. My second tip is we have to reframe fear. Now fear is going to come up a lot in this podcast. It's an absolute bugger and it's there for all of us but I just want to talk really top line today about reframing fear.
Now I love an acronym and I was about 42 years old when someone said fear f e a r false evidence appearing real. That My lovely ladies is mindset. Fear is all in our minds. We start creating outcomes before we do anything. Fear and excitement release the same chemical in the brain. So see fear for what it is.
It's a sign of growth. And tap into being a bit excited in there too. But it is not real. I'm not saying your feeling isn't real. I'm saying what you're thinking and telling yourself is not real. Because the fear is, if I do this, this will happen. If I do this, this could be the outcome. It hasn't happened yet.
False evidence appearing real. It stops us moving. My third tip for you is to always celebrate your wins. This is about being really clear. And that every small step you take is a win. And you've got to acknowledge and celebrate every single act of courage, no matter how small it might seem. Because by acknowledging and a little celebration, you are showing your brain that evidence again, which helps you build your confidence.
And my last tip, I think it's my last one for now, is to be really clear what What your success looks like, and I'm going to use the word visualise. Now I'm going to talk about visualisation another day. Because I actually struggle with, inverted commas, visualisation. I am not a close my eyes, meditate, and visualise girl.
But, and this is about reframing what visualisation is actually, we all have an imagination, and that is visualisation. In fact, I know you can visualise because I guarantee you do it when you're in fear. I bet that not only do you have the feelings of fear, but in your mind, you visualise the outcome that's giving you the fear.
So if you can do that, you can also visualise positive outcomes. And that's what we need to do to build the mental courage needed to take action. So we need to visualise success. We need to give ourselves an opportunity to imagine. Not only could that not so great stuff happen, but this good stuff could happen.
I could get what I want. So visualise, imagine, if it's a better word for you, what success will look like and feel like. Courage is the foundation that confidence is built on. So today I want you to think about where are you waiting for confidence? And instead I'm going to challenge you to take one small courageous step.
That's why I choose courage over confidence and why I invite you to as well. Now I'd love you to share your thoughts on courage and confidence and what this has got you thinking about. You can drop me a message directly, Shelly at shellybosworthcoaching. com or tag me on the socials and let's get everyone involved in the courage versus confidence conversation.
β π Thank you for listening. I hope you found today's episode of the She is Courageous podcast really useful. But most of all, I hope it's got you thinking, and if it has got you thinking, why not consider whether there's a friend you could share it with who needs a little more courage in their life. And if you haven't already, connect with me on Instagram at Shelly Bosworth Coaching, where I share more tips and inspiration to keep you moving forward.
And remember, She is Courageous, and She is You.
ABOUT SHELLEY
Hi ππ» Iβm Shelley, Business and Mindset Coach and Shelley Bosworth Coaching International and founder of The She Is Courageous Collective.
I am an ICF accredited Coach, with a passion for supporting women to understand themselves and their mindset, my absolute mission is to help as many women as possible to get out of their heads, out of their own way and achieve their true potential professionally and personally.
With a 25 year corporate career in senior multi function roles in well known UK retail and hospitality businesses, I absolutely understand the reality of life, my own story and experiences have been a rollercoaster but understanding my mindset has been the key to resiliently bouncing back, keeping going, building a 6 figure business in my 40βs and achieving goals I only dreamed of in my younger years
This is why I am so is passionate about helping you understand the power of your mindset so that you can take courageous action rather than simply wishing, hoping and berating yourself for not moving forward.
If youβre ready to master your mindset and get into massive momentum then you are in the right place!
